Needing Attention

Last night, my husband expressed some disappointment with me. He just wanted me to sit next to him on the couch for a little while, but I kept busy with other tasks that I wanted and felt like I needed to get done. I got defensive about his wanting attention and my being too busy because I was getting things done and the only way I can figure out not to be so busy is to drop some of my commitments, which I'm not sure I want to do in some cases, or realistically can in others. I want to go to Bible studies and help with the Homebound ministry. He encourages these activities. I need to be active and doing different things with and for the kids. Not everything, I know, but kids do take a lot of time, energy, etc. If I'm outside playing with them, preparing for a birthday party, craft, or science experiment, etc., it takes time. My husband said he did not intend for me to drop all my activities - he just wanted some time with me. I apologized too and told him he had just entered my own personal battle and welcome.

Anyhow, enough of my gripe and justification and back to the point of this post.

I was thinking about this and the thought came to me, "He's being just like God our Heavenly Father and like Jesus to the church!" Wow, that's exactly what I want and what God wants! Then I started thinking further about what that meant.

My husband was just asking for me to be still for a little while and spend some time in relationship with him. Psalm 46:10 says "Be still, and know that I am God; I will be exalted among the nations, I will be exalted in the earth."  God, our Father, wants us to stop the busyness sometimes and be still. Just 'be' for a little while. Spend time in conversation with Him, not just talking as in a monologue, but by listening and allowing it to become a two-way conversation. Just be close to Him for a while and recognize who He is and how much He loves us.

Ephesians 5:22-27 says "Wives, submit to your husbands as to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior. Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything. Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her to make her holy, cleansing her by the washing with water through the word, and to present her to himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any ore blemish, but holy and blameless." My husband really does love me greatly. Those of you who know him personally can see this. I need to show more respect to him - as the head of our marriage and family. I try, but need to continue to improve.

I am also reminded of some of God's messages about needing rest, about taking a break. These passages mostly refer to keeping a Sabbath day, which I'm not good at, but I can take steps in the right direction. Some of the passages I'm thinking about are Genesis 2:2-3 and Exodus 20:8-11.

So, here's what is needing attention in my life: I need to find the opportunities and make myself stop the busyness, be still, and spend time. I've gotten better at making time with God, but it needs to be mirrored in my relationship with my husband, too. He needs (and deserves) my attention. He is seeking it. Looks like I've got some work to do.

Making Plans

I haven't written a post in so long, almost two months now. I had plans to write but found it difficult to find the time to sit down and do it, especially during the holiday season (which also holds two children's birthdays for which to plan parties - not done with that yet).

I am in the habit of making New Year's resolutions. No, I'm not especially good at keeping them all, but it does give me a good reference point to refer back to and keep record of my progress. Some things get accomplished very well, but others fall to the wayside, no matter how good-intentioned. Some things accomplished this past year were memorizing at least 12 new Bible verses and maintaining previously memorized verses (currently up to 81 verses that I practice); have at least four dates with my husband; develop a chore list for the kids (developed, but not well-implemented - that goes for my chore list, too, though); do aerobic exercise at least one day of every week (okay, so it wasn't every week, but I think 27 out of 52 weeks is pretty good for me); earn 10 CEUs to maintain my licensure and certification; complete at least one sewing or craft project (did at least 3, which made Christmas presents); complete Pre-k curriculum with Daughter; potty-trained Son. Some not accomplished well: having a devotion time with my husband once a week; instituting quiet times for my children at least three days a week (they're a little young, probably, however Bible Time in the mornings is going very well right now); finishing our wills; reading a couple specific books; selling unwanted/unnecessary items to raise money for the family; do toning exercises 4 out of 7 days a week (major failure!); play piano at least once a month; play oboe at least once a month.

Now I'm in the process of developing new goals for this year. I had plans to scale them back, and still might, but there are some really important ones I want to keep/add. I plan to increase quality time spent with my husband; read those books I never got read last year; earn 10 more CEUs; complete at least one sewing project; save money to use for our family's next vehicle; finish our wills!!!; and do some removal of excess in our home and schedule. I plan to teach Daughter to tell time, tie her shoes, and memorize the Lord's Prayer. I plan to teach Son letter and number identification, among other undetermined goals at this time.

I was taking out the trash this morning and thought about the nandina and holly berries that Daughter had collected with plans to plant them all and grow a whole bunch of new plants. She is definitely our little gardener; we currently have four bean plants and two airplane plants growing in our kitchen that she recently started. She always has grand plans for some kind of project, game, imaginary play activity, etc. Unfortunately, she has a couple of parents that manage to dash some of those plans. It can be so hard to work out all the details of the projects along with other activities that need to be done for the family - you know, things like fixing dinner, getting ready for bed... Ten minutes before dinner goes on the table is not the best time to pull out the paints, glue, scissors, etc. The nandina and holly berries were thrown away without Daughter's knowledge yesterday evening, by the way. She'll remember them and ask about them, I'm sure. She almost always does. The time of collection was just not a good time to be planting a whole bunch of new plants. Plus, they were moldy by now and needed to go.

How many times do we make plans only to have God tell us 'no' or 'not right now?' I can be very good at making lists and plans to do things, only to realize that there is not enough time to get them done, that there are other important things that need to be done, that they are just not feasible at the current time. Sometimes I learn that I am just not the right person for the task.

No matter what we may try to plan, God has a better plan.

Jeremiah 29:11 - For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.

Proverbs 19:21 - Many are the plans in a man's heart, but it is the LORD's purpose that prevails.


May God bless your plans today. May your plans be ones that He would desire to bless, ones that would bring glory and honor to Him alone. May you seek Him first - His kingdom and righteousness (Matthew 6:33).

Creative Expression Assignment

The week before last, I gave my daughter an assignment to make up a song about anything that she wanted. That's pretty much all the instruction I gave her, and here is what she made. **For anyone posting comments who knows our family personally, please refrain from using Daughter's actual name.


"Jesus and God"
To the tune of: "Jesus Loves Me"

I love God and He loves me
He loves me and I love Him
I love Him and some day I'll
Go to heaven to be with Him

And I love Him so much
And I will love it so much
I will play the drums with Him
And jump on clouds - what fun!

And I'll do the trumpets, too
And I'll see the animals
I will see his butterflies
I'll see the lions and they'll be nice

I will play the bells with him
I will see the flamingos
The first thing I will do up there
Is go to His throne room.


God has been written all over this little one's heart! It does make my heart glad! (3 John 1:4)
Also see Proverbs 7:3, Deuteronomy 6:6 and Deuteronomy 11:18 (among others).

Little Words...

Two mornings ago, I was mowing our yard. It takes about an hour and a half to mow our almost-half-acre lot with a push mower. I was about two-thirds of the way done when I thought about getting to cross it off my to-do list. Then I thought about where it was written on my list. Such a small word - Mow - right there, nestled among the many other tasks I have written down at this time. Such a small word, but it was a big job and took more time than would many of the listed items whose titles are comprised of many more letters.

My next train of thought led me to Christ. Did he have anything big on his to-do list that was such a small word? Yes, he did: D-I-E. Another small three-letter word, but one that took a lot from him. It took his life. It took his resolve and commitment to follow his Father's will, even though he knew how horrible it would be. It took more time than it took him to heal or bless many of the people he impacted through his ministry (the whole process, that is, from arrest to trial to beatings to the cross...). His healings and blessings sometimes took as little as a word or a touch. You know, he could have stopped it at any time - but he didn't. And because he didn't, what a HUGE impact the workings of that small three-letter word in his life has been in the lives of so many countless others. This was God's plan. This is what it was all for. WE are what it was all for.

The smallest things that we can do for people sometimes may have a great impact. Just notice someone, smile at them, say 'hello,' recognize them as a person who has value. I remember a time when I stopped to talk to a gentleman who was homeless sitting outside of our church building. I actually talked to him on two occasions. The second time, he said, "Most people walk right by and never say anything to me." All I did was say hello, shake his hand, and ask him if he was interested in coming inside.

Be willing to rearrange your schedule and make some sacrifices of your time, comfort level, and own wants for someone else today. You have the opportunity to be blessed more than you can imagine and any sacrifices you make will be worth it. If God leads you to say or do something - say or do it! He won't let go of you until you do - or until you drown the voice of the Holy Spirit. Don't let it be the latter in your life.

God loves you, more than you can ever imagine. May you feel His great love for you today and may you share that love with someone else.

My New Job

I have a new job! I've been in it for about 2 1/2 weeks now (and did a test-run February through mid-July). It is one in which I get to work from different locations. I can work at home in my pajamas, at the library, while visiting family, while camping - just about wherever and whenever I choose to work, I can. It will be a challenging position, dealing with learning new information, gathering needed resources, brainstorming creative ways to present information, schedule conflicts and other people's agendas sometimes taking precedence over mine, but I'm still looking forward to it. My main co-worker on the job is a 4 1/2 year old, though...After four years as a full-time wife and mama, I have added the position of home educator!

This is not a decision I made lightly. About five years ago - maybe even just four - I would have told you I would have never considered home-schooling my children. Then, a couple years ago, my thoughts on the issue began to change. I began meeting some people who home-school and learning their reasons, methods, etc. I've seen and heard about how it works in their families. I began growing in my walk with Jesus and seeing the world around me in a different way. Then, less than a year ago, when I was considering how our family would choose to educate our children, I began getting answers.

Below are some of my reasons and considerations regarding my decision to home-school our children. Please keep in mind that these are my own convictions and I do not try to impress them on anyone else. I believe God has a plan to use us all to spread his Word and love, but that can look very differently for different people.

1.       Because the Holy Spirit told me to. God revealed it to me most vividly through a Bible study, Sunday school lesson and the prompting to read the book of James late one night. The verses and discussion that came to me within the span of about a week and a half led to a confidence that this is God’s will for our family.

2.       Build a strong foundation of God’s truths – Biblical, Christian worldview

a.       Philippians 4:8 - Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable--if anything is excellent or praiseworthy--think about such things.

                                                               i.      Not rude, ugly, indecent, unseemly, unbecoming, crude, obscene.

b.      James 5:20 - remember this: Whoever turns a sinner from the error of his way will save him from death and cover over a multitude of sins.

3.       God wants parents to teach their children.

a.      Deuteronomy 4:9 - Only be careful, and watch yourselves closely so that you do not forget the things your eyes have seen or let them slip from your heart as long as you live. Teach them to your children and to their children after them.

b.      Deuteronomy 6:5-9 - Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength. These commandments that I give you today are to be upon your hearts. Impress them on your children. Talk about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up. Tie them as symbols on your hands and bind them on your foreheads. Write them on the doorframes of your houses and on your gates.

                                                               i.      It would be difficult to impress these on our children throughout all our activities (sit, walk, lie down, get up) if they are away from us for 8-10+ hours at least 5 days a week.

c.       Deuteronomy 11:18-21 - Fix these words of mine in your hearts and minds; tie them as symbols on your hands and bind them on your foreheads. Teach them to your children, talking about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up. Write them on the doorframes of your houses and on your gates, so that your days and the days of your children may be many in the land that the Lord swore to give your forefathers, as many as the days that the heavens are above the earth.

                                                               i.      Same as above point.

d.      Proverbs 22:6 – Train up a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not turn from it.

4.       Allow children to mature some spiritually before bombarding them with outside temptations and influences.

a.       2 Timothy 3:1-7 – But mark this: There will be terrible times in the last days. People will be lovers of themselves, lovers of money, boastful, proud, abusive, disobedient to their parents, ungrateful, unholy, without love, unforgiving, slanderous, without self-control, brutal, not lovers of the good, treacherous, rash, conceited, lovers of pleasure rather than lovers of God – having a form of godliness but denying its power. Have nothing to do with them. They are the kind who worm their way into homes and gain control over weak-willed women, who are loaded down with sins and are swayed by all kinds of evil desires, always learning but never able to acknowledge the truth.

                                                               i.      I do not want the effects of such individuals in my home.

                                                             ii.      In verse 5, we are warned to avoid people like this (“Have nothing to do with them.”)

                                                            iii.      I do not want my children to be like them.

                                                           iv.      I want my children to be able to learn AND acknowledge the truth.

1.       In the public schools, the students are “always learning and never able to come to a knowledge of the truth” because the public school system does not allow any teaching about God.

2.       We CAN teach knowledge of the truth of God within our home.

b.      Beth Moore “The destructiveness of indecency comes from the mind’s tendency to replay events, words, or pictures. If we experience and replay those events often enough, we lose our sensitivity. Then the indecency appears in us. Agape is never obscene. If we participate in the indecent or obscene, we cripple our ability to exercise agape.” (Living Beyond Yourself study)

c.       James 1:27 - Religion that God our Father accepts as pure and faultless is this: to look after orphans and widows in their distress and to keep oneself from being polluted by the world.

d.      James 4:4 - You adulterous people, don't you know that friendship with the world is hatred toward God? Anyone who chooses to be a friend of the world becomes an enemy of God.

e.      James 5:20 - remember this: Whoever turns a sinner from the error of his way will save him from death and cover over a multitude of sins.

                                                               i.      We need to keep our children away from many sins and save them from eternal death.

f.        Deuteronomy 7:26 - Do not bring a detestable thing into your house or you, like it, will be set apart for destruction. Utterly abhor and detest it, for it is set apart for destruction.

                                                               i.      What kind of things would be detestable to us? Crude language and behavior, promiscuity, disobedience, disrespect – to name a few.

5.       Flexibility in lessons, methods, schedules

a.       Lessons outside, more/different trips, schedule can look different day-by-day

6.       Stress value of family and relationships.

a.       Opportunities to possibly spend more time with family and friends.

b.      Home-schooling may allow us more time and opportunity to serve others.

                                                               i.      James 1:27 - Religion that God our Father accepts as pure and faultless is this: to look after orphans and widows in their distress and to keep oneself from being polluted by the world.

                                                             ii.      Isaiah 1:17 - learn to do right! Seek justice, encourage the oppressed. Defend the cause of the fatherless, plead the case of the widow.

7.       What about socialization?

a.       Plenty of opportunities – Sunday school, children’s choir, once-a-month class with Austin Nature and Science Center, class with co-op once a week (starting next year), group of home-schoolers with weekly park play-dates, additional play-dates, Bible study class while Mama is attending a Bible study, MOPs (Mothers of Preschoolers).

8.       What if I don’t know what I’m doing?

a.       Ezekiel 36:27 - And I will put my Spirit in you and move you to follow my decrees and be careful to keep my laws.

                                                               i.      We can go through an experience as if we are familiar with it because it is the Spirit of Christ working in us and He is familiar with it (thought from Beth Moore’s Living Beyond Yourself study).

b.      Philippians 4:13 - I can do everything through him who gives me strength.

                                                               i.      I might be nervous, but I can do it with God’s help and the Spirit’s guidance.

c.       Proverbs 3:5-6 – Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight.

                                                               i.      God will guide me. 

9.       What if people disagree with me?

a.       2 Timothy 3:12 – In fact all those who want to live a godly life in Christ Jesus will be persecuted.

                                                               i.      No, people will not agree with our decision to home-school, among other decisions, but if we’re following God’s lead for our lives, then we will have persecutions to endure.

b.      We have a good, strong support network of families who are home-schooling their children.

10.       But it’s going to be hard!

a.      2 Timothy 3:14-17 - But as for you, continue in what you have learned and have become convinced of, because you know those from whom you learned it, and how from infancy you have known the holy Scriptures, which are able to make you wise for salvation through faith in Christ Jesus. All Scripture is God-breathed and is useful for teaching, rebuking, correcting and training in righteousness, so that the man of God may be thoroughly equipped for every good work.

                                                               i.      I need to stay firm and continue in what I believe the Lord is leading me to do.

                                                             ii.      Use Scriptures to teach

                                                            iii.      Verse 17 – so that the man of God may be thoroughly equipped for every good work.

1.       I am going to be using Scripture throughout my children’s education so they can be thoroughly equipped for every good work.

b.      Easy does not necessarily mean good. Hard does not necessarily mean bad. Home-schooling would be hard – much harder than just putting them in public school. That would be easy. (Thought I had during Beth Moore Living Beyond Yourself study)

c.       Whenever I’ve considered not home-schooling, a grief washed over me from head-to-toe. I was grieving the Holy Spirit by just considering not following his lead.

You know, as I've thought about it lately, my previous work as a speech-language pathologist (SLP) in the school system prepared me for this position. I got to see in different classrooms and see the activities they did with the kids. I have incorporated some of those into our home environment and love having that information to draw from. As an SLP, I tended to work in small groups with children. I prefer this much more than I would a whole classroom of students. I worked mostly with 1-4 students at a time, from ages 3 to 18. How neat that I will get to work with small groups, just like I prefer, by educating my children. Plus, all the skills I learned to work with different children for different speech and language issues - I get to use them with my children and to help others.

Also, ever since I was in high school, I believed that I was supposed to raise children to know Jesus - whether they were my children or somebody else's children. I always took that view when I worked with students at the schools and now I have my own children. Any job I ever remember considering to have ever since I was little has dealt with working with children.



If you are interested in researching home-schooling more, I'd recommend that you check out www.confessionsofahomeschooler.com. Erica has such a wealth of experience and resources to share.

Heaven!

This morning, I was reading in Isaiah and the descriptions of heaven in Isaiah 33 and 35 made my heart rejoice so much. I wanted to share the excerpts with you. I hope they bring much joy to your heart.

Isaiah 33:15-24

He who walks righteously and speaks what is right, who rejects gain from extortion and keeps his hand from accepting bribes, who stops his ears against plots of murder and shuts his eyes against contemplating evil - this is the man who will dwell on the heights, whose refuge will be the mountain fortress. His bread will be supplied, and water will not fail him. Your eyes will see the king in his beauty and view a land that stretches afar. In your thoughts you will ponder the former terror: "Where is that chief officer? Where is the one who took the revenue? Where is the officer in charge of the towers?" You will see those arrogant people no more, those people of an obscure speech, with their strange, incomprehensible tongue. Look upon Zion, the city of our festivals; your eyes will see Jerusalem, a peaceful abode, a tent that will not be moved; its stakes will nevver be pulled up, nor any of its ropes broken. There the LORD will be our Mighty One, It will be like a place of broad rivers and streams. No galley with oars will ride them, no mighty ship will sail them. For the LORD is our judge, the LORD is our lawgiver, the LORD is our king; it is he who will save us. Your rigging hangs loose: The mast is not held secure, the sail is not spread. Then an abundance of spoils will be divided and even the lame will carry off plunder. No one living in Zion will say, "I am ill"; and the sins of those who dwell there will be forgiven.

Isaiah 35 (My Bible titles this section The Joy of the Redeemed.)

The desert and the parched land will be glad; the wilderness will rejoice and blossom. Like the crocus, it will burst into bloom; it will rejoice greatly and shout for joy. The glory of Lebanon will be given to it, the splendor of Carmel and Sharon; they will see the glory of the LORD, the splendor of our God. Strengthen the feeble hands, steady the knees that give way; say to those with fearful hearts, "Be strong, do not fear; your God will come, he will come with vengeance; with divine retribution he will come to save you." Then will the eyes of the blind be opened and the ears of the deaf unstopped. Then will the lame leap like a dear, and the mute tongue shout for joy. Water will gush forth in the wilderness and streams in the desert. The burning sand will become a pool, the thirsty ground bubbling springs. /In the haunts where jackals once lay, grass and reeds and papyrus will grow. And a highway will be there; it will be called the Way of Holiness. The unclean will not journey on it; it will be for those who walk in that Way; wicked fools will not go about on it. No lion will be there, nor will any ferocious beast get up on it; they will not be found there. But only the redeemed will walk there, and the ransomed of the LORD will return. They will enter Zion with singing; everlasting joy will crown their heads. Gladness and joy will overtake them, and sorrow and sighing will flee away.

Time-Out!

My son really doesn’t like time-outs. Which is good – that’s the purpose right? He sits there saying/crying, “Mama! Mama! Mama! Mama!...” I was thinking about it last week, that the separation from Mama during the time-out seems to be the greatest punishment for him. Then, this made me think about how sin separates us from God.

When Adam and Eve sinned in the Garden of Eden (eating the forbidden fruit), they were sent out of the Garden. When they left, they experienced a separation from the communion they had previously with God. I mean, they used to WALK in the garden WITH Him! Talking directly with Him! WOW!

When Jesus was on the cross during the ninth hour, “Jesus cried out in a loud voice, ‘Eloi, Eloi, lama sabachthani?’ – which means, ‘My God, my God, why have you forsaken me?’” (Matthew 27:46, Mark 15:34). The sins of the world on his shoulders separated Jesus from his Father God.

Here are a few more verses about sin separating us from God: Isaiah 59:1-2, Jeremiah 5:25, Ezekiel 39:23-24, Micah 3:4, Habakkuk 1:13.

So, our giving time-outs to our children for their sins is providing them with a separation from their parents, which is a small reflection of the separation we experience from God when we sin.

Now, a few thoughts on discipline. We are expected to discipline and train up our children. If we put aside discipline, we are not helping our children at all – and making life miserable for ourselves and others. I’m not sure time-outs are the best. I've read in the Bible about using a rod... I do believe that different methods work better for different circumstances and children - but I believe they must be something that will cause the child not to want to do whatever the sin was again. Some people are against punishment, but God isn’t! Some people think only positive reinforcement should ever be given. Such was mentioned to me recently, but I said that I wanted my children to recognize their sin and feel sorrow over it. This is what God expects from his children – for us to recognize our sin and confess it. We should have godly sorrow over our sin so that we desire to repent, turning away from the sin.

Here are some verses I found regarding discipline: Proverbs 3:19-20, 12:1, 13:24, 19:18-19, 22:6, 22:15, 23:13-14, 27:5-6, 28:23 and Proverbs 29:15, 17, 19, and 21. James 5:20 can be applied also.

What I got from these verses is how important discipline is. Just talking about the issue is not enough (there has to be a consequence) and sticking to the consequences is also very important. We are responsible for teaching our children what sin is and that they need to avoid it, in order to save them from death and teach them about God. If we truly love our children, we will be intentional and consistent in disciplining them.

Here are another couple verses that I thought were important to consider: Proverbs 12:18 and 15:1. These verses remind me of having the correct attitude when disciplining. We should not discipline our children out of anger or through our own other emotions (tired, frustrated, stressed, etc.). We should be calm and in control when meting out discipline.

Another thought I had before posting this: I use Bible verses when disciplining my children. I want them to know that I am not punishing them just because I don't like something they did, but because it is something that God doesn't like, that it is sin that is being punished. Some of the verses used most often are Ephesians 4:32 ("Be kind and compassionate to one another...") and Exodus 20:12, Ephesians 6:1 and 6:2 (honor/obey your mother and father). We also discipline for tantrums, but I haven't looked up verses for that yet (until just now when I was thinking about it and have found these few as starting points - Ephesians 4:31 and Philippians 2:14-15. (I guess that will be my next Bible search.)

We talk about how their behavior would not please God and how it affects them and others. We often talk about appropriate behavior and other solutions they could have tried instead of disobeying/being unkind/throwing a tantrum. We always end the time-out time with specific apologies (ex., "I'm sorry for disobeying."), the disciplining parent saying 'I love you,' and hugs and kisses. OH!- and they don't get out of time-out after only the minutes-per-age. If they are still throwing a tantrum after the time is up, they stay there until they have gained control and calmed down, being able to talk. Otherwise, they won't be able to talk to or hear the parent anyway!

I looked back over previous posts and saw that I posted another one regarding disciplining and training up our children back in March (title: Train Up a Child) that you might want to review also.


May God bless you as you go through your day and week. May He show you how your sins are separating you from Him and may you be brought to a desire for repentance. I pray that you have a chance to read the verses listed and they are helpful to you as you consider disciplining children and God's discipline of us.