Focus, Focus, Focus!

I get so frustrated, sometimes, at my son's lack of focus. He can get distracted so often throughout the course of  the day and I am frequently having to redirect him back. Getting his schoolwork done can be such a chore some days.

Yesterday, he experienced the natural consequence of having to do his math assignment while Sister was outside playing because he didn't get it done earlier in the day. Today has been quite frustrating so far, too. I couldn't get him to sit down and eat his breakfast (the food he requested), but as soon as we start school, he's hungry. Even then, I have to frequently tell him to either eat or do school because he has wandered off to rock in the rocking chair, check something out in his room, look outside, roll on the carpet - who knows what!

As I was going to bed after midnight (again) last night, I lay there talking to God, saying for at least the third day in a row - and probably the seventh or so time in the last two weeks - that I felt far from Him. I told Him that I want to draw closer to Him again. I want to meditate on Him, His word, and His provision and action in my life. I want to be in His presence, to be able to kneel on the floor of His throne room, giving Him honor and praise (at least figuratively at this time).

Then, it hit me that I am as distracted as my son. I was up late because I had read articles on the computer. I had checked on just about everyone on Facebook. I complained about technology issues while trying to participate in an online book party (not that we need any more books in this house...). Then, when I went to get ready for bed, there was a book lying on the bathroom counter. I read some of it while brushing my teeth...and then kept reading...just one more chapter...and then, it was late.

I don't know how many nights it has been now that I am the last one awake in the house. My children and husband are all asleep before me. I'm missing out on connection time with my husband and that makes me sad. But I haven't changed it yet.

I get distracted throughout the day, too, just like my son. I jump between one activity to another, often not even completing the first one (or second, or third) until much later - when I wander back through that room and realize "Oh! I forgot I was working on that!" I think my husband has gotten to the point of just shaking his head at me.

But I want a change. I am praying for will power and renewed focus on what is really important. I want to focus on what needs to be done and what will have the most value - to God, for my family, for others, and for me. I want to provide more structure for my son so he can be successful, too.

One more point. I am so frustrated with my son! It is very apparent in my voice tension and volume, in the words I choose, in my physical posture, and I'm sure it is written all over my face. Unfortunately, this also rubs off on my daughter, who huffs and mumbles about her brother and his behavior similarly to what I hear myself doing. Again, this makes me sad.

Does God respond to us in this way? Usually, I don't think He does. I think He is patient with us and waits for us to make the decision. He lets us experience the natural consequences of our choices, and hopes that we will choose better next time. (You know, I think I sometimes do that too, trying to let my son make the choice about his activities with the hope that he'll choose better next time.) I don't think God typically gets frustrated and huffy with us. Then again, we can experience a separation from Him. It doesn't feel good, just like my son doesn't feel good when he knows I'm frustrated and upset with him. And have I ever told you about the time God shoved me? My kids love that story. Yes, I believe God does sometimes speak or act in such a way to get us back on track, to help us refocus. Sometimes He gives us a shove in the right direction - literally or figuratively.

I could use your prayers.

• Please pray for my interactions with my son, that I may respond to him with gentleness and respect, but still be strong about what is expected. 
• Pray for him to be more willing and cooperative. We have discussed his behavior a few times and he says the way he acts is in his control, so pray that he will choose to be in control.
• Pray for me to avoid unnecessary distractions in my own activities. This would help in so many areas - leading and guiding my children, closer connection with my husband, more pleasant environment, less stress about what isn't getting accomplished.
• Pray for me to align my actions with what is truly important.
• Pray that I will have a renewed depth of my relationship with God, that I may go to bed truly in worship and praise rather than apologies.

Isaiah 45:22 "Turn to me and be save, all you ends of the earth; for I am God, and there is no other."

Psalm 46:10 "Be still and know that I am God; I will be exalted among the nations, I will be exalted in the earth."

Proverbs 4:20 My child, pay attention to what I say. Listen carefully to my words.

2 Corinthians 10:5 We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ.

1 Peter 3:15 But in your hearts revere Christ as Lord. Always be prepared to give an answer to everyone who asks you to give the reason for the hope that you have. But do this with gentleness and respect,

Colossians 4:6 Let your conversation be always full of grace, seasoned with salt, so that you may know how to answer everyone.

Ephesians 4:29 Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen. 

Proverbs 25:15 Through patience a ruler can be persuaded, and a gentle tongue can break a bone.

Please share any additional Bible verses or thought that you have.